“April is the cruelest month,” wrote the esteemed poet, T.S. Eliot, but I, a mere mortal, must take issue with his conclusion. Given the winter we’ve endured here in Toronto, I would submit that February has earned the title of the cruelest month, because it has teased us with a bit of warmer weather before bringing Jack Frost back to taunt us.
Good grief, it has been cold this winter! There have been days when even the squirrels who play in the yard next door have been rarely visible, and who can blame them? The weather has made me long for a fur coat of my own — although mink would be much preferable to a squirrel’s pelt.
Here are seven reasons I’ll be happy to see February 2014 in the rear-view mirror:
- Ice and more ice: As if the Christmas ice storm of 2013 weren’t insult enough, the sidewalks have been caked with the slippery stuff. Two falls so far, with only my pride and my backside hurt.
- Groundhog Day: As usual, Punxsutawney Phil, Wiarton Willie, Shubenacadie Sam and their marmot counterparts offered us grim news: six more weeks of winter. If it’s only six, I’ll be grateful!
- More bulk: My toes is froze – and they aren’t the only parts! Layering has become a daily ritual; the only question is “How many layers today”?
- Vacation envy: Jealousy isn’t an admirable emotion — see The 10 Commandments — but, wow, have I felt it in spades! Seeing smiling people with tans on commercials sets me to weeping, and I have declared a moratorium on viewing Caribbean vacation photos.
- Slow going: The poor weather has made driving more perilous. Woe be to those of us who need to use our cars! I truly pity the daily commuters.
- Valentine’s Day: Alas, I wasn’t the lucky recipient of any cheerful flowers or yummy chocolates this year. Great for my weight, not so good for my ego.
- Bye, bye Lady Mary: Downton Abbey, my favourite BBC series, ended its season last weekend. How could the folks in TV-land abandon me during this grey time of year? Don’t they know I count on them for a weekly dose of joy?
I probably could go on and on, but then I’d be too blue to finish my homework or meet my clients’ deadlines. So I’ll leave you with one positive February thought: 2014 isn’t a leap year!